Saturday, 14 January 2017

When Bob nearly met his Maker....

Hi there!
Thanks for dropping in.
Another little friend dropped in today too.
Certainly woke Dave up when he went to light the stove 
this morning!


Don’t know who was more suprised -
Dave, or Bob the Squirrel !




Brave Dave indeed!
They’re savage little monkeys -


and fast!
Just as Dave was going in to gently haul him out,
Bob shot past him,
and started doing a little panic tour of the room at breakneck speed.

I opened the back door in hopes he would go to the light,
and in the time it took to run and shut the pantry door, 
he was gone. Made a dash for it. Like a grey flash. 

So I got to thinking.
How long had he been in the Stove?
Had his wife been wondering where he was?
Were the children on the lookout for Dad?


Here’s how it went when he finally got back home,
after his Friday night escapade...

“What time do you call this, you philandering squirrel you !?? ”
(Surrey version)

“It’s not what you think Julie. I was trapped at the bottom of a deep black hole. One minute I was up on the roof, tormenting the rooks, and the next I fell down a chute and must have knocked myself out.
It was terrible. When I woke up, it was cold, dusty and dark, and I was looking out through a filthy little window, which really needed cleaning. But I was locked in!
Then suddenly the windows opened and these big hands were coming for me!”

“Don’t you give me one of your tall tales (tails?) ! You’ve been over the road showing your nuts off to that other one, haven’t you!”

“What other one?”

“I’ve seen you fluffing your tail, you old stop out! Here I am working my fingers to the bone, trying to keep these kids under control, and there you are, parading your nuts around in the other garden!”

“Julie Julie Julie, do ya love me?
Julie Julie Julie, do ya care?”


Listen to the first part.
Bob wrote it in the stove....




I shall go and put some nuts out for him now,
poor little sod.
He must have been terrified.

Love & Hugs,
Barb
xxxx



59 comments:

  1. Haha! Great start to my day really made me laugh!! Thanks

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  2. Ha ha I do love reading you blogs. Although they look cute squirrels can be visious ( spelling?) I think Dave have a lucky escape. A few years back a squirrel got into a friends lounge , it took forever to get it out!

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  3. Pmsl!! That's hilarious. What a great start to my Saturday - thanks Barb, Dave and of course Bob and Julie. Xxxx

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  5. Aww, lucky for Bob there was no fire when he fell or he would have roasted nuts! So now we'll be going round singing Julie Julie.... just played it to hubby and he said that was a blast from the past. All I can say is it's better than a rook or a crow ! Xx

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    1. Or a Maggie, not black and white but totally black and with a vicious temper. xxx Maggie

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    2. Should read MAGPIE not a Maggie. Idiotic predictive text. xxx Maggie

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  6. Haha thats so funny , reminds me when we lived in Lowestoft we moved into sons house and he lived in ours simply because his had bigger garden..running up and down , the people that lived in it before had a pet shop and bred baby mice in shed.. we were invaded with them they were inside the walls thank god we had Thomas the cat , we also had a cockatel , looked in his cage and saw mouse in food hopper, o its suffocated i thought , so went slowly to get it out ..well i nearly jumped out of my skin it jumped out and ran off ,think Thomas caught it . we had traps every were Bernie wouldn't kill them though he took traps and let them out in a field there was a pub near to field. one day it had a sign Kitchen closed do to rodent invasion !!!!! xx

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  7. Thats made my day, very funny. Could have been bad for Dave though. We were walking in a local beauty spot a while ago now when a squirrel ran a up a blokes trousers. No screams so he was ok he just kept shaking his leg and the squirrel ran off. Have a great weekend.xxx

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  8. Poor Bob, he was obviously looking for a bigger drey for Julie and the kids.
    Now as you can see, they have clearly outgrown their previous abode! Shame on you! Dashing his hopes and aspirations like that.
    I'll look through the window to our log burner in future before opening it, just to make sure Bob hadn't passed on any information to his cousins about vacant possession. Xxx

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  9. Our bless him good job you opened the door love the story hehe xxx

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  10. Lovely story!! Poor Bob the squirrel! Haha!

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  11. Ohh Barbara that story did make me laugh
    Your sense of humour is so lovely 😊 and the innuendo about nuts. Great πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
    I can see you both trying to help poor Bob that vision will make me smile all day
    Have a wonderful Saturday xx

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  12. Barbara you are "nuts" πŸ˜‚ Poor Bob not only scared to death after a night locked in but then he gets a rollicking when he gets homeπŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£
    Can't get that song out of my head now and pictures of Bob and Julie
    Have a great weekend
    MaggieH

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  13. Blooming heck what a tail lol ;-D x

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  14. Thank you for the tale of the adventure of Bob, hope you have all recovered from the surprise, and have a relaxing weekend. Many years ago, I saw a squirrel moving her very little kits from one home to another. Whatever had disturbed her I shall never know, but it was a truly magical moment. xx

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  15. Ha ha great story to wake up to, & my name in it lol... never thought of a Mrs Squirrel called Julie... funny.. love you wood burner though, my Sister put one in a big summer house down her garden , they built it themselfs, her hubby installed the fire. Really Cody in winter & even ok to sleep in in snow / Frost at Xmas, as house had extra family staying & no room in main house. Xxxx

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  16. Aww poor wee thing. How amazing he survived. Glad it was your chimney he fell down! At least he's getting a good meal, and a top up to his winter caches to help him recover. I miss squirrels here, only seen one once, they are good to watch. I had a female at my last place who would come and pose for photos in return for nuts!!!! She was good fun. Dave must have got some shock! It feels weird eh, well did to me, to have a wee animal running round inside, when you're used to seeing them only outside, it didn't fit, in my head. I was lucky, never thought of wild animals biting, I caught one of my field mouse visitors in my cupped hands to put it back outside!

    Thank you for cheering me up. My week has gone from bad to worse. Did get the delivery mess sorted, well not the best, but will do. But during all that I've ended up with a parcel for across the road, didn't know how to say "no"! I did tell him I coulldn't take it over, he said he'd put a note through their door, saying to come over for it. No one has been! So I've got a big box in my hall that's not mine, fearing folk I don't know coming to my door, and now fearing what to do, and what's going to happen to me now I've signed for something that's not mine, and I've still got it. And now a letter just came in, I've been selected for Jury Service! Great, yet one more problem to sort out. My garden guy is already dealing with a 40 page benefit reassessment form that's to be in by Friday, and now this on top, that might involve me having to go to the GP for a medical certificate, don't know if they'll do one without seeing me. So this to worry about too. He's away this weekend so can't even tell him about either problem just now.

    Even taking away my physical, and my mental health, problems for not being a Jury Member, can you imagine someone with Asperger's on the Jury!!! Don't think they'd be very happy about that eh! With our communication problems, interpreting written and verbal, making ourselves understood, inability to read non verbal, everything black and white, right and wrong, and no in-between, everything taken/interpreted literally, and viewing the world/society in a different way to everyone else. Can't decide if it would end up far more folk convicted, or far more let off because we didn't know how to decide!!!! Our support/help are forever trying to help us understand, yes technically it's wrong, but it's actually ok/acceptable, and vice versa, and that's just every day things, and I still don't 'get' it!!!

    Hope you have a good day doing something nice, even if that's just cuddling up in front of your log fire. I'm hoping to have a Mindfulness day crafting after chores!
    Love Brenda xx

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    1. Brenda I wish I could take some of your worries away, I hope you get the jury service one sorted quickly which I'm sure you will when your lovely garden man is back. Sending you a big hug and one for Daisy too. Xx

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    2. Thank you for thinking of me like that Diane. Hope you're doing ok after Emma going back to Aberdeen xx

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    3. So sorry you've been given another worry to sort out Brenda, be nice if the person across the road could befriend you, then you may have someone who could help you out now and again. I sure would if we lived near you. Hugs to you and Daisy.xxx

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    4. Aw, thanks Pam. Wish you did live near. Or any of my bloggy pals. They are new people, not seen them out and about, so not managed to get a feel for them. The only neighbour I speak to is my next door one, and she's elderly and has arthritis. I'm sure she would have wanted to help and look out for me if she was able. It's kind of the other way round, I look out for her. And me and my garden volunteer try to help out in wee ways when we can. What's happening with your back? Have they worked out what the problem is yet? Thank you, hugs back xx

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  17. You have cheers me up, have bad head and sickness for two days 🀒 Thanks Barbara'

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  18. Thanks for the entertaining blog Barbara. Made me giggle and can't stop laughing about it every time I think of it.xx

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    1. How are you,doing Susan? Have you got your medication/upset stomach sorted yet? xx

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  19. All I can say, now the giggles have subsided, is that it is a good thing Bob did not fall down my chimney. The thought of a frantic squirrel and two manic dogs does not fill me with joy. Hope Dave did not get bitten. Squirrels have a vicious bite as our Doberman found years ago when she caught one over the fields. She dropped it rapidly. I would love to know what he said to his wife when he got home,boasting about his escape. xxx Maggie

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  20. Haha haha, you are one crazy women Barb but that's why we luv ya πŸ˜€πŸ˜€πŸ˜€

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  21. A grey squirrel???
    You want to feed a grey one??
    You're mad Mrs.

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  22. What a funny story Barbara and you were lucky to evict Bob fairly quickly. We did help to remkve a squirrel frkm a friend's house once which proved to be not such an easy task. It was hiding in a piece of rolled up carpet and we tied bags to either end and were going to take it to the local park to let it go but it had other ideas, and we were just outside the house when it shot out the top like shot from a canon and legged it off up the road at a rate of knots...lol. The elderly lady was rather upset that she didn't get to see it released in a more safe environment but hopefully it found some nice trees up the road. We still laugh about it now when we think about how funny it must have looked. x

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  23. Great tale (tail?) today Barb...it could only happen to you! We sometimes have a squiggle (as they're known in my house from the day we took my very young sons to Windsor when they literally 'squiggled' up the trees - squirrels that is, not the boys - lol!) runs along our garden fence then rapidly leaps up to the tree where we think it's made its home...thankfully no chimneys or flues for it to drop into! Xx

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  24. You're wasted with this crafting lark, Grey. You should be writing! x

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  25. Sorry - bloody spellchecker changed the Gray to Grey! xxxx

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  26. I've lived in my house for 29 years and only ever seen 2 squirrels in my garden. When the extension was being built the builders enticed one to run along the fence everyday at dinnertime, they would give it tidbits. But after the build was finished I never saw it again x

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  27. You made me smile with your story and I'm glad Bob made it out to get back to his family. It reminds when the cat brings in mice. She's of the age now that she doesn't kill the mice she just gentle brings them into the lounge and gives me a present. Then me and youngest daughter often spend hours chasing the mouse around, moving furniture and laughing a lot.

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  28. Hi Barbara, that has brightened up my day.
    Where I used to live we had squirrels they used to berry their nuts in my large plant pots and then when hungry come back and dig them back up.
    it was fun to watch them.
    Have a good evening.
    Lynn xx

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  29. Lucky Bob that Romeo was obviously asleep somewhere or I'm sure he would have had him (cats seem to have a natural hatred of squirrels - Charleycat certainly does, he is out like a shot to guard the garden if our local Bob is at the peanuts!!!)
    Love
    Maggie (Yorkite)
    PS forgot to say I love my paper pads - are they the same type of stuff as Theuver card?

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  30. Oh Barb, what a giggle, I have actually had a squirrel in the kitchen before, so I know the jumping and dodging that goes on. Hopefully Julie forgave him. Take care. Bx

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  31. I like your little story's of half truths that's what is so funny.
    It made me smile.
    You have hidden talents of story telling.
    A collection of them put together would make a lovely gift.

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  32. Thanks for this little tale, poor Bob! We have squirrels here in our garden always running up and down the fence. Surprised my two cats haven't tried to get them, but thankfully they leave them alone, now birds and mice are another matter! Enjoy the rest of your weekend.
    Hugs to you and Dave
    Linda xxx

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  33. A lovely anecdote and your peramulating thoughts were very entertaining. I can just see that squirrel bombing out the door. Thank goodness it didn't get further into the house or Julie may have been waiting a long time for Bob to retuning avec les nuts!
    Loved listening to the song too. Love and hugs, Jeanette xxxx

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  34. I love how you always see a story in things that happen around you.

    I haven't told you yet how excited I was to hear that you have taken over Pergamano. I'm sure there will be some great changes, advancements in the near future. Much heartfelt congratulations.

    Love watching your videos and also your tutorials on Hochanda. Can't buy from there, but love to learn from you and see the new product coming out. So glad I can watch on my laptop. (would you please put in a word or two for me about the need for them to come to the US ?!)
    Loving those Groovi's, I do regular parchment too but find I am not ruining so much parchment now with Groovi. I made one of the Night before Christmas books for my sister as she collects them. No, we are not young adolescents, lol, we are both in our late 70"s

    Have a great Day Barbara!

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  35. I love, love, love Bob's tale (tail)! It made me smile :)
    Wendy

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  36. Hi Barb,
    Poor Bob! I'm pleased he managed avoiding being roasted! I know they are classed as vermin, but I do think they are cute. Every time Dave and I go to London, we go to a Greenwich Park , take a packet of monkey nuts and wait for the squirrels to come to be fed. They take the nuts very, very gently and sit on their hind legs nibbling the shell away and then the nuts. They are really funny. Sorry I didn't comment yesterday, but lack of sleep caused a migraine so was in bed all day. My lovely papers came today and have to say they are fabulous! Already made two quick thank you cards for the A&E dept and the Ward staff as they were absolutely brilliant. Love and hugs Alison xxx

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  37. Hi Barbara
    Oh what a great surprise Dave had this morning and what a laugh, Julie and Bob haha. What a good thing the fire wasn't lit when he fell, his nuts would have been well and truely roasted and Julie wouldn't have been happy! Have a lovely cozy evening by the fire, tell Dave to wait until the snow has gone before he ventures on the roof to cover the chimney!!
    Love Diane xxx

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    1. Hello lovely blog friends hope you are all keeping safe and warm. Snow has gone here but it's blooming cold. Sending warming hugs xxx

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  38. That was a close call! As I was reading I could picture one of my favourite Christmas movies with Chevy Chase - 'Christmas Vacation'. They have a squirrel incident and it makes me laugh every time! Hope you, Dave and Bob have recovered. XX

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  39. Evening bloggy friends, just uploaded my entries for the stamp and groovi challenges! One month ticked off. I even used my new paper pads! I know, I was shocked myself. Just off to lay down and recover. XX

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  40. So funny and clever . Thanks Barbara Janice

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  41. Oh Barbara you really got to write a story you are a natural. That was so funny. Poor little thing must have been very scared. xx

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  42. What a lucky escape for Bob, he would have been in real trouble if the fire was lit. We don't often see squirrels round here but one lunchtime as I was leaving home to go back to work I saw my cat looking up a lamppost. There at the top was a squirrel so I called the cat away and went to work. Four hours later when I got home it was still there. I kept going out to check on it and eventually rang the RSPCA. They told me that sometimes when they have been chased up somewhere like that they freeze and to go and bang on the lamppost to wake it up. He came down later when I wasn't around. I bet his wife thought he was telling a tall tale. xx

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  43. Hello Barb,
    You make me smile, and what is even better you make others smile.
    Maureen xxx

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  44. This happened to me too. February 2015, was recovering from an operation and it was a very cold snap. Was in bed for two days, after the wood burner had last been lit. On the third day I staggered downstairs, and thought I saw movement through the window if the wood burner....opened the door just enough po spy a very black squirrel, that if attracted by the embers and warmth, had been in there for a couple of days.
    Felt too poorly from the op to tackle it myself, so called for help!
    My cousin and husband came over armed with thick gauntlet leather gardening gloves....set up furniture to encourage it to the open door if it got out, and went for it!
    The squirrel was grabbed by the scruff of its neck and thrown into the garden but almost bit through the glove en route! It promptly ran up the garden and onto the fence and spent the next ten minutes cleaning itself up....

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  45. Morning Barbara! I didn't see this yesterday! And in some way glad as it gave me such a giggle this morning!
    Poor Bob the squirrel! At least Dave saw him before setting the fire going!
    Have a good day today. Love and hugs xxxx

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  46. Highly entertaining Barbara. I hope both Dave and Bob are now fully recovered!

    June x

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  47. You really make me laugh with your song.... Poor Dave anyway, and poor little squirrel. Really hope Dave has recovered from his little adventure.
    Laurence xx

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  48. Oh, what a laugh. I wonder if Dave or Bob was more shocked? Glad he survived to tell the tale though! x

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Thank you for your kind messages and I hope you get inspiration from my ramblings.

Barb x