Wednesday, 22 July 2015

Mindful Wednesday - Fake it to Make it.

Hi there!
Good of you to pop in.
Mindful Wednesday is the day I blog from the heart,
and we try to make some sense of this crazy thing called Life!

I have just spent a very soothing Groovy afternoon
at the Crowborough Retreat.
If you were ever looking for a creative activity which requires 
as little or as much thought as you can rustle up,
but keeps you focussed on the Here and Now,
then our Groovi Parchment System is a definite option!

It certainly hit the spot for me today.
There’s something about just getting in the track or the groove 
of the etched plates, and then tracing out a lovely design, 
which settles and calms the mind. 
I love it. 


But today I wanted to broach the subject 
of dealing with a crisis,
of handling a problem,
of tackling a situation.

Ironically, we had one last weekend, 
when Dave had a ‘cardiac event’, as they call it. 
The thing is, it’s not what happens, 
but how we react to it which ultimately affects us, right?

Doesn’t matter what life throws at us, and oh boy! 
Life certainly has a way of biting you in the arse 
when you least expect it! 
But the response is what defines the moment, don’t you find?
Episodes like ours on Saturday instantly rightsize everything.
What was important one moment, is unimportant a minute later.
And what was taken for granted is immediately catapulted to the no. 1 spot in the priority charts. 
So currently, Dave is No. 1 


and everything else has suddenly become less important. 

Let me tell you about my toolbox.
I have a toolbox full of tools for dealing with Life. 
Figuratively speaking of course!
And on Sunday, I got it down from the loft, dusted it off,
and decided what was the best course of action. 
What was the best reaction to the situation.
You see, I think we do have a choice as to how to react. 

Let me give you an example.
Workshops started in Crowborough on Monday.
About 100 lovely people expected here during the course of the week.
Cancel the retreats? Well, it was an option. 
Sorry, not an option. 
Would it serve a positive purpose? Hell no!
Why create unnecessary drama and upset other peoples’ plans?

Did I want to do them? 
Not a question worth entertaining, because it was irrelevant.

Rummage round in the Toolbox, 
and pull out the Fake it to make it Card.
Bright yellow, with a big smiley face on it.

Works every time. 
I think that sometimes it’s best to fake it to make it. 
I don’t think it is being false;
I just think it’s not worth throwing a blanket of doom and gloom over an already pretty worrying situation.
It’s not being stoic, or a martyr;
it’s called being considerate of others 
who simply got caught up in it. 

And while I’m faking it to make it, 
I actually stay in the moment and enjoy it.
Rather than projecting and worrying about things 
I have absolutely no control over;
or languishing in the melodrama of the past event,
I stay in the day with all my friends and customers -
(keeping half an eye on Dave, who’s propped up in the corner, where I can see him!)

But now it’s time for supper,
so I’ll see you later!

Love & hugs, 

70 comments:

  1. Hi Barbara totally understand where your coming from ! It's called survival tactic and parchment crafting is so soothing ! Your both in my prayers take care of yourselves God bless Rose xx

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  2. You are brilliant at the Fake it to make it thingie. As you so rightly say, a crisis instantly puts things into the right order. There is no option. However, one vital lesson to remember is that you must take care of yourself if you are to be of any use to Dave. As much rest as possible and enjoy every second together. xx xx Maggie

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    1. PS are you really sure it is Wednesday already? Where has this week flown already? xx Maggie

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    2. Great advice Margaret xx

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  3. How very true Barbara. you never know what life is going to throw at you at any time. Would have understood if you had cancelled. Good to hear that Dave is ok and looking forward to seeing you on Friday.

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  4. Give Dave a hug from me and hope you are both back to yourselves soon. Hugs all round, Jax

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  5. I don't know what to say Barbara, I can imagine how difficult it is to keep on doing what needs doing, I'm thinking of you both, lots of love xxx

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  6. hope faves feeling better both of you take care

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  7. hope faves feeling better both of you take care

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  8. Never a truer word spoken. Hugs x

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  9. Hi Barbara
    I think keeping occupied is best sometimes or you worry yourself silly.I'm sure all will be well with Dave and hope he's taking time to relax.Sending you both a BIG hug x

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  10. Had a completely stressful morning dealing with staff issues that I did not handle well and upset both of us. Could have carried on working, probably lose my temper over nothing, so what we would Barbara say being mindful Wednesday. Do some art, so I did, had a pleasurable and soothing afternoon printing up lino cuts, gently cutting in shading, shaving away the unwanted, linking up and printing up. I've long used craft as my anti-stress release in the evening and at weekends but not as a direct release when faced with a stressful situation. It worked I feel calmer more able to deal with it, so roll on next Mindful Wednesday

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  11. That has been my take on life.
    When life rains on you, go stamp in the puddles.
    I laughed at a visual picture of dear Dave propped up in the corner.
    Hugs
    Cally x

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    1. I like that quote, a good way of facing a difficult situation, thanks Calls x

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    2. We could use those new bits of equipment in the centre of the room for Dave to stamp in the puddles. xx Maggie

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  12. Please take care of you too. Lots of love to you and Dave...

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  14. Love the gorgeous artwork above, very much looking forward to having a go with the Groovi mate. Take care of each other xx

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  15. Love your attitude! Definitely a woman thing! Hope all goes well with Dave.

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  16. I half expected retreats to be cancelled this week and I am sure everyone would have understood if that had been the case. Well done for carrying on. We have had an eventful year as well,the first three months were a real worry and we all felt low but events are improving now. We kept life going as normally as possible and it does help. So thoughts are with you and Dave and hope results are good. xx

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  17. Great moto fake it to make it. Sometimes its the only way through a difficult time. Get up and paste a smile on, join in the fun and try and fool the mind into believing it too. Xx


    Hi Brenda, glad you posted this morning, knew you were having a hard time. Thinking of you and sending you lots of love and hugs. Xxxxxx

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    1. Hi Donna I'm not that strong I just crumble big hugs xxx
      Hi Brenda good to know your able to blog today if only to let's us know your ok big hugs xxx

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    2. I found this quote, ideal for today's blog:

      You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have.

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    3. Your so kind Donna thats a lovely quote and that was once me always the strong one but life has thrown me many big mountains to climb now I'm very ill i crumble .
      That's why clarity gives me a reason to face each day .
      Have a wonderful holiday and hope you get to do your canvas and groovi too lots of hugs xxx

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    4. It must be hard to feel ill every day. I'm glad you find comfort in your craft and having a chat here. Xx

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    5. I amaze myself how strong I can be sometimes but I do find a lot of comfort just chatting here so thank you all...x

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    6. Same here, love coming on here and chatting, sharing the comfort. Xx

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  18. Sending a big crafting hug to you and Dave (life was never ment to be easy but why does it have to be so tough ) thinking of you hope Dave gets his results soon ,thank you for our mindfulness Wednesday xxx

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  19. Hi Barb,
    Firstly, beautiful piece of artwork - simply stunning.
    Well done ( to both of you) for carrying on as normal. I know how worried you both must be but having some normality does help. However, you both must just take things steady and get plenty of time for just you two - everything else doesn't matter. I do like Cally's quote and can just see Dave splashing in those puddles ( like Singing in the Rain!). Love to you both, Alison xx

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  20. while i can understand you carrying on from a business point of view. i'm sure people wouldn't have minded if workshops were postponed. life is precious and we only get one chance at it so we really need to make the best of it.
    glad to hear that Dave is getting better but he needs to be resting as probably do you so you are able to look after the both of you as Maggie said, hugs xx

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  21. The Wednesday chat certainly cheers me when I read your words. If things go pear shaped I don't panic usually I adopt a solution quickly and get on with it. After the event or twopence-halfpenny drama (or more serious) I tend to shake, but as my hands shake most of the time nobody ever notices, thank goodness. Keep on looking on the bright side and give Dave a get well soon big hug. take care X

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  22. You're good at smiling and carrying on regardless - I remember coming to a workshop with you years ago just after your mum had her diagnosis, and she was there with her slate pendants, your dad was there with a smile on his face too, and everything went like clockwork and was so professional! I like that he's No 1 on your list, and hope he stays there, except of course when YOU need to be No 1 on your list - nothing else is more important!! Take care, and hope Dave gets some positive news soon, Susan x

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  23. Thanks Barb for your words this evening. I have just got back from taking my partner to A&E thinking he had broken his ankle. I have never seen him in so much pain I have to say. But kept positive and the good thing is its just a very bad sprain and on crutches for 6 weeks.

    The realization is that it could have been a lot worse, and at least its in the summer so maybe nice time lounging in the garden having cups of tea will be the necessary time for us to relax.

    Time for me to get in the Groove and colour my next project (thanks to you)

    Hope you and Dave have a few quite moments to relax and take in that wonderful countryside which is near to you.

    God bless Pen x

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  24. Wow Barbara you are a brick. To turn the whole event on its head and look at it in that way is a lesson to us all. I, for one, feel very humbled by today's blog. Have a good and restful night, ready to face tomorrow! God Bless. X

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  25. So glad you have enjoyed your day. Thank you for your lovely Wednesday blog. I have introduced my daughter and daughter in law to it because I think with their busy lives it will help them to be positive when they are feeling stressed. (School Hols etc)

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  26. I'm a big fan of Fake it till you make it .. Going out for dinner with friends tonite and I have been feeling lousy so I will fake it , and it does work ,at least for awhile .,prayers for you both

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  27. This butterfly and background are beautiful Barbara and the blue is so pretty. I can see that the 'fake it to make it' idea keeps your mind under control and makes you keep yourself together for the sake of others, but I'm not sure I can do this convincingly. I suppose though I have had some difficult times and did manage to be fairly strong. The saying 'when the going gets tough the tough get going' springs to mind. Hope Dave's results come soon because I'm sure the waiting is the worst and can be really stressful which doesn't help either x

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  28. Hello Barbara

    So true. Nine years ago my daughter-in-law was diagnosed with a terminal brain tumour aged 39. As a family we had to deal with this. We could have sat around waiting for the end or we could have put our heads down and got on with life. We all chose the latter. Nikki had a good life until she died last year. Her life would have been dreadful if we all went around with long faces.

    I am not, for one minute, assuming Dave is dangerously ill but nothing is solved or made better by going around all doom and gloom is it.

    Love
    Roz.x

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    1. So sorry for your loss Roz, you have to get busy living, a great attitude to have x

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  29. It must be a worrying time for you. I admire you for being strong and putting on a brave face. I hope everything turns out well, keep positive. Big hugs to you both,
    Linda

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  30. Thinking about you both in a happy, smiley, positive way! Good vibes are always good, I hope you can feel them! Lovely butterfly by the way! xxx

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  31. You are so right I usually try and get on with things but its not always easy.

    Hugs to both of you and take care of each other.
    CraftyJacq
    XX

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  32. You are so right I usually try and get on with things but its not always easy.

    Hugs to both of you and take care of each other.
    CraftyJacq
    XX

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  33. You are so right I usually try and get on with things but its not always easy.

    Hugs to both of you and take care of each other.
    CraftyJacq
    XX

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  34. Hi Barbara
    Lovely artwork from your Groovi time, have you got Dave doing it too or is he sick of the sight of Groovi plates?! You are such a trooper so sending you a big hug, keep that smile on your face and your chin up and look after yourself and your lovely Dave. Love and hugs Diane xxx

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  35. Very true Barbara I do get where your coming from I know a lot about faking it to make it I done that for a while saying I was fine when I wasn't but now im learning to just get on with my life and be happy and keep occupied . Bet the retreat ladies cheered your Dave up and took his mind of worrying about things better medicine than anything...xx take care..xx

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    1. Hi Brenda here's tonights cuddle miss yi...xx

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    2. Hi Dorothy thinking of you hugs xxx

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  36. Barbara ... Stay strong .... Pull on those trusted ones around you, look after Dave, look after yourself
    It's not always a case of the show must go on... Sometimes, we have to make that number one the focus before you become 1a alongside it.
    Very glad though that the grooving session proved helpful to you - after all that's what you made it for!!
    Much love, healing thoughts to you both
    Kim xx

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  37. Hello Barb, very wise words, thank you for sharing. Can just imagine Dave propped up in the corner, with you checking on him every few minutes. Take care of yourselves. Bx

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  38. Hi, as you know Barbara , I am a very bad place at the moment, life now so different, but your words have struck a cord with me at this sad time. I am going to print your words off and look at them, also to remind me of the good things in life and your words of wisdom, whilst I am here, Thank you for your email of support,

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    1. Sending best wishes to you and yours Lynne. Hope you can take a step towards a better place for you today. x

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    1. Sending caring hugs xxx

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    2. Thank you Sheila, I really need them

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    3. Hugs for you, sounds like you need them. Xx

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  40. Hope you're both ok. Take it easy. x

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  41. Gosh you are a wise old bird! Not old but indeed wise! I'll try to keep that in my mind!
    Hugs to you both xo

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  42. Lovely blog today Barbara hope day 4goes well take comfort from all those people that love you. I hope daves results come soon he's a lovely man I have met him once but he was very kind to mexx thank you Barbara love June xxxx

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  43. Well said. Sending love to all!

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  44. Barbara, you are an inspiration to us all. Hope Dave is feeling better. Have had a "cardiac event" myself. Have my fingers crossed for Dave.
    Love and best wishes to you both
    Gayle x

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  45. So sorry to hear about Dave, I hope you will both be OK.

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Thank you for your kind messages and I hope you get inspiration from my ramblings.

Barb x